When you hear the words “you have cancer,” it feels like a meteor has crashed into your life. Everything that felt solid a moment ago is suddenly gone—your plans, your sense of safety, the very ground under your feet.

The impact is immediate, and the shockwave keeps spreading. Not only do you not have a clue as to how or where to start the clean-up, you are pretty sure another meteor is coming right behind it.

Your body reacts before your mind can even catch up. Heart racing. Chest tight. Thoughts spiraling. You’re in full-on panic mode. Shock, grief, sheer terror. Your whole nervous system gets hijacked.

And what rises first, almost always, is fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of treatment. Fear of what this means for your body, your family, your future. 

If this is you right now, you are normal.

Fear is the most natural response to something this big. But here’s the hard part—most women believe they’re supposed to push that fear down and keep carrying on anyway, keep moving through their lives as if nothing has changed. Keep working. Keep caring for everyone else. Keep functioning, even while they are falling apart inside.

But as with any emotion, pushing fear down doesn’t make it go away. It only makes it louder. It hijacks your sleep. It clouds your thinking. It makes it nearly impossible to focus on the medical decisions in front of you.

That’s why the very first step is to pause and breathe. Slowly. Deeply. It’s not just a cliché—it literally resets your nervous system. It tells your body: I am safe, right here, right now.

The second step is to name what you feel. Fear. Anger. Grief. Naming your emotions gives you back a measure of control. They’re no longer just swirling in the dark; they’re out in the light, where you can begin to work with them.

And third: don’t isolate. Silence doesn’t equal strength. You don’t have to go through this alone. In fact, letting trusted people in—whether family, friends, or women who’ve walked this path before—is one of the strongest choices you can make. This doesn’t mean you have to include everyone right now. Let your instincts guide you as to who you want to support you now. You may be surprised.

Here’s what I really want you to know: with the right support, fear doesn’t have to rule your days. You can reduce it. You can even release it completely. And when you do, not only do you feel better (good in itself), you start to think more clearly. You can make decisions about your treatment and your life from a place of calm instead of panic. Without the background noise of fear screaming inside you, you can listen to what your brain, your heart, and your gut are telling you.

That’s exactly why I created my upcoming workshop, “You’ve Just Been Diagnosed With Cancer. Now What?” It’s a safe, supportive space for women who are exactly where you are right now—staring at the scorched, smoking, gaping hole in the earth after that meteor strike and wondering what to do next, but too scared to even think about it.  

We’ll use practical tools to calm your nervous system, and release the overwhelm, so you can begin to face what’s ahead with greater steadiness and clarity.

Fear doesn’t get the final word. You do.

👉Click here to register for the workshop.

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